why?

Yes sportsfans! we're switching to Englishahofamora. That is not!... the fucking spell to translate to English from Harry Potter.
You need a million dollars? Yes you do... even if you have 50 trillion you will always need those extra breadcrumbs. Why am I talking about this? I'm not... it's word vomit!
Be cute, be clean, B(i)e Ber!!!!
I will shoot anyone that makes me nervous. I will shoot them! an e-mail...
Do you want to live your life reading stupid one-liners, but in an awkwardly pretentious way that denies pretention? No! get out!
What is this? Do you want me to read your blog? No. Why would I be writing stuff like this were I to get you to read my blog?
please stop... there is a back button... if not ... you'll find the x on the page... you can literally not be this ill equipped. I am sorry I did this to you.. I didn't mean to do this ...
I wanted this blog to be nice... for nice and casual .. you go to the other blog...  the thought blog.

Think it through... why would I do this?

WHY?